what to say?

it's a gloomy day in oxford. it's 1pm and yet it feels like an autumn dusk. it even just looks cold from my windows and the red and yellow leaves seem forlorn rather than basking in the changing of the seasons. funny though, how i ascribe emotions to animate yet clearly non-human entities.

it's now four o'clock and the haze has not lifted. the rain has been coming in drips and drabs for the past number of hours. yet, it is a perfect sunday. there has been rain, there has been brunch, there has been a bath and there has been the perfect opportunity to talk endlessly about nothing and everything.

brunch was wit the college's italian dante scholar where we had a lengthy and fascinating gab about all things ranging from mind/body connection, the goodness of humans, fine film, history's most intriguing characters and the possibility for a new thinking on sexuality. this is why i love sundays- no agenda, no parameters and no pretense!

i'm tired of writing that life is manic so just for today i will pretend that everything is fine. the busyness of it all gets so tiresome so i would like to pretend my life is all sundays- all lie-ins, brunch and lattes. unfortunately, it is not and could not be- the problem of having to earn an income, be productive and realise that while esoteric randomness is enjoyable it is, in most cases, fruitless. so tomorrow i will return to the show that goes up this week, the transcription still waiting to be done, the endless meetings and the eternal reading which can not and will never be finished.

but just for this moment, i will make a cup of tea and pretend that there is nothing more important than the changing colours of the leaves and the possibilities of hugs in heaven.

. . .