so, long time no blog. sorry, but it's been a busy week and i've been putting off writing because i've either had other things in my head or i've been writing elsewhere. i've back from toronto since wednesday and avoided the dreaded sleep in the thunder bay airport and even managed to fly direct and first-class both ways- something that the bitchy, vacant air canada ground stuff didn't help with.

tuesday and wednesday i was in muskoka (thanks jesse) and got to unwind from pride a little with some good wine, a great friend and tranquil surroundings. i played a little tennis, did some canoeing and basically just did nothing.

other thoughts running through my head these days:

a) i just finished reading the brothers k. such a great book and something that i think will stay with me for quite some time. i think this line has come to influence my very thoughts on the world:
"Like when you get really mad maybe slap somebody or jerk their arm or something, like Mama does to us sometimes, I think an invisible hump of energy might go flying all the way up their arm and right into their skeleton or insides or whatever- a hump of mean, witchy energy- and I think it might fly round and roand in there like a witch on a broomstick flies round the sky, and go right on hurting invisible parts of the person you don't even know you're hurting, because you can't see all the ways their insides are connected to the mean thing you did to their outside. And from then on, maybe that hump of mean energy sits inside the hurt person like a coiled-up hose or a rattlesnake, just waiting in there. And someday, when that person touches somebody else, maybe even way in the future, that rattlesnake energy might come humping up out of them by accident and hurt the next person too, even though they didn't mean to, and even though the person didn't deserve it."

b) I went to go see L.I.E. again this week with my friend Bill. I was struck by many of the same thoughts and emotions as the first time I saw it. However, I still arrive at the same questions what equals consent in sexual relationships and how good art manages to make the uncomfortable and despicable so beautiful to watch.

c) I am trying to avoid being a life-long hypocrite and so am thinking about how I will resolve the counter-vailing forces in my life around money. Do I live simply and give lots away?; do I enjoy life's finer things and give the rest away?; do I choose a vocation or jobs that will make the choice of simplicity for me? Anyway, this is largely stemming from conversations with my friend John who has way too much money and I'm sure I will continue to think this through.

Miss many of you and hope to see you soon... good night....