choices

there are times when i simply want to reject free will. just make me a puppet, make me know at all times what my purpose is, show me the aisle lit up in the event of an emergency to ensure i find the safe exit. unfortunately, i'm stuck with free will (unless i sell my life), and now i need to live with the choices.

i'm agonizing over a whole bunch of big things i need to sort out rather promptly. i need to decide what i'm doing about jobs for next year, i.e. whether or not i'm going to apply for junior dean jobs. this has a major impact on the house i'm supposed to be living in next year and the people i'm to be living with. this also impacts whether or not i'll run for welfare officer for the mcr committee. i'm leaning towards yes on the junior dean front, no on the house/welfare front.

i also need to sort out my schedule for next year. when will i go to australia for 2 months so as to ensure i get the most amount out of it research-wise? can i live with another christmas away from home? when else can i get that long a block of time?

then there's the summer: will i get the part in shakespeare to go to japan? if so, am i reneging on edinburgh? also, where the hell am i going to live?

anyway, it's been a stressful time with school, performances/rehearsals and all of these impending decisions... i think i'll just follow the pretty lights down the aisle now

. . .